You Are What You Wear

The Art of Making A Good First Impression

But I have come to learn two very important things: The first is that your image can cost you a lot. You can lose out greatly in terms of missed opportunities and relationships from a bad image and bad dressing. The second is that changing your image and the way you dress can change your life.

People’s first impressions are most often based on what’s on the outside. If you do have a chance to interact with them again they might get to like what’s on the inside once they get to know you better. But often times, especially in the world of business, if you mess up that first impression you are very unlikely to get a second chance to impress with your “inner magic.”

First impressions matter
William Hazlitt put the issue of image this way: “First impressions are often the truest, as we find (not infrequently) to our cost, when we have been wheedled out of them by plausible professions or studied actions. A man's look is the work of years; it is stamped on his countenance by the events of his whole life, nay, more by the hand of nature, and it is not to be got rid of easily.”

A lesson learnt the hard way
I learnt this some months ago when I went out to a couple of offices with the intention of seeing the managers at those places. I felt very confident going there, was very solid about what I had to discuss with them and spoke well.

However, after attempting three offices the best I got was to leave my number with the secretary or whoever was at the front office and told that they would get back to me. That was enough to dampen my spirits and make me give up on seeing any more people for that day. It goes without saying that they never called me.

It was a while before I got the courage to attempt such a thing again. I went out just like last time with almost the same message and equally confident and optimistic. This time around things were much better and I was more successful. The more I managed to get into one door the more enthusiasm I had to knock on the next.

It was not hard to understand what was different about the two situations. The first time I had gone there I was dressed very badly for the mission, though I did not realise it at the time. I had on a pair of trousers with one of those casual shirts that you don’t have to tuck in.

It seemed to me that if I was comfortable with what I was wearing then that was fine. But I had missed the point entirely. You see, usually it’s not about what you are comfortable with, but about what the other person will think of you when they first see you.

This was well-illustrated to me the second time I ventured out again many months later. I was dressed much better, in a suit and tie. My sister, who is into professional fashion and grooming, will tell you that I still have some ways to go in polishing how I dress and look. But it was a good lesson for me because up to that point I had never really believed the saying that you are what you wear.

The world is not always fair
The immediate feeling I got was one of disappointment and resentment. It was clear that we generally judge each other based on outward appearance. Could this be a shallow way of judging other people?

Well, what other way could you judge someone in those first few seconds or minutes before you decide whether to let them in or shut the door, particularly if you are a busy person with many demands on your time?

This is exactly the reason why it is worth taking the time to dress well and create a favourable image. It lets the other person know that you take yourself seriously and you take what you are representing seriously.

Ignore it at your own peril
Perhaps this is something that many people going for job interviews would do well to understand. Having been on many interview panels, it is my experience that a lot of times the outcome of your job interview is determined the minute you walk into the interview room. In those first few initial seconds your dress and grooming will determine whether you stand any chance at all with the rest of the interview.

If your image is bad it is very unlikely that you will get the job, no matter how proficient you might be technically. It may sound harsh and superficial, but it’s right on the money. Fred Charette advised that you “never hire anyone who is going to report directly to you who you do not intuitively just plain like from first impressions. If your instincts tell you you're going to have a hard time working with someone, pass.” Dress and grooming is a big part of that first impression.

Be more confident
One other benefit to dressing appropriately and well is that it makes you feel more confident and successful and you start to behave accordingly. If you want to be promoted to being a manager then you would do well to start dressing like a manager.

If you want to be a highly successful business person then you would benefit greatly from dressing like you already were such a person. Your faith is brought alive by your actions and you are more likely to take your business or job much more seriously if you dressed accordingly.

Don’t forget the inner stuff
However, a word of caution: a good outward image alone will not make up for a lousy character. Once you are in the door and have made that first impression you want to build on it by impressing people with your character.

Otherwise they will soon get to know that you are a fake and not worth their time. Outward appearance can only go so far. The ultimate winner is who you are on the inside and how you relate to other people.

Your services, products and performance also have to be consistent with the impression you create from your outward appearance whether you are in business or an employee. Don’t dress like a million dollars and offer a 5 cents service. Worse still, don’t expect to be paid according to your dress. You will be paid what you are worth in the value you add to other people’s lives.