Follow The Follower - How To Be You

By that I mean that we tend to follow others blindly without questioning. We behave and do as others are doing without questioning whether the people we are emulating are qualified to lead us. It is a case of the “blind leading the blind.”

The secret of success
There was once a young man who went on a quest to find out the secret to success. He initially tried to ask his parents, the neighbours, friends and others he knew around his neighbourhood, but did not get much from them. Then one day he realised that he had been asking the wrong people. It occurred to him that all the people he had been asking lived in his poor neighbourhood and none of them was successful.

Therefore, he concluded, it was not a good idea to ask people that were not successful what the secret to success was. He decided to not ask them anymore and went on instead to the public library and to other people whom he saw being successful. He became extremely successful as an adult and went on to teach many other people the principles of success.

That young man realised in time that it was wrong to follow people that did not have the qualities or the kind of attitude towards life that he wanted to have in order to be successful. But a lot of times we do not have this kind of perception of things. We are happy to do what everyone else is doing without asking what results everyone else is getting. We are happy to just be followers, never mind who we are following.

Conformity is a big enemy
One of the reasons we do this is our need to belong and conform as human beings. Conformity is a very strong social need. Some very interesting experiments have been done concerning this need to conform, some of them more for fun than for scientific progress. There is a one video I particularly like that has been doing the rounds on YouTube. The experiment in this case involves an elevator. The usual way to stand in an elevator is facing the door at the front. In this particular case four or five people who were part of the experiment were told to face the back of the elevator. Then, an unsuspecting passenger would come in who would face the front of the elevator.

The first thing this “subject” would show was bewilderment as they stood there wondering why everyone was facing the back. This quickly turned to nervousness and embarrassment as they were the only ones facing the front. Then slowly, but surely they would turn to face the back as well. A variation of this had people facing the side of the elevator. In both cases the results were the same. The subject would inevitably turn and conform to what everyone else was doing, never mind that it did not make any sense.

Avoid groupthink
Groupthink may be another way to describe this phenomenon. Groups experiencing groupthink do not consider all alternatives and they desire unanimity at the expense of quality decisions. Groupthink therefore leads to faulty decision making in a group because conformity becomes the overriding consideration. Speaking of this phenomenon in his co-authored book “Why We Want You to Be Rich,” Donald Trump says “It’s the old mentality that seems to bring out the best and the worst in people. By the best, I mean that sometimes a shepherd will surface. But that’s an unlikely scenario. It’s usually the wolves that will surface first, and the herd will be primed and ready to follow. What we are trying to do here is break up the herd before we are incapable of seeing, hearing, thinking and doing for ourselves. People who are capable of thinking for them will rarely be part of a herd.”

Think for yourself
That is exactly correct. People who think for themselves make their own quality decisions. As has been pointed out countless times only 5% of any population are truly successful people. It therefore follows that 95% are not. The question is “are you seeking out that 5% of the population in order to find out what makes them successful so that you can be successful too?” Imagine the folly of the 95% of the population that are not truly successful consulting amongst themselves about how to be successful. They obviously will not get any great answers that way. They need to get away from the herd in order to find the correct answers.

But fear prevents them from doing that. There is some sense of “security” to be obtained in being part of a group, whether it’s a wrong group or not. Leaving it means we have to look to ourselves and become our own leaders. That is a scary prospect for most people. They would rather be led than be leaders themselves. As Robert Kiyosaki observed “The fear of being different prevents most people from seeking new ways to solve their problems.”

Be yourself
I often think that the world would be a more colourful and interesting place if people were allowed to be themselves. Imagine what would happen if everyone was encouraged to explore their individual uniqueness, talents and strengths. Imagine taking a child and nurturing them as an individual from the time they are young. Would that child not grow up to appreciate that they are unique and have something unique and important to contribute to humanity? I think they would.

Studies have shown that when children first enter the school system they are very imaginative and creative and can think "outside the box” as we like to say. But by the time they are graduating from the formal education at college level this imagination and creativity has been all but extinguished. They have been effectively trained to think “within the box” within the boundaries of what they have been taught at school.

It is no surprise to me that some of the most enlightened and creative people around and in history failed at the formal education system. In fact, I would think it was exactly the fact that they did not get regimented by the formal education system that their minds remained flexible and able to explore life beyond what others would. They found a way to look at life through their own eyes and follow their inner voice and intuition. Albert Einstein is one such example. I wonder if he would have made all the discoveries he did if conformity had gotten a hold of him?

Formal education is very important. But realise that you do not have to be like everybody else. You have abilities within you that cannot be brought out by formal education. Abilities whose power you need to recognise and be willing to nurture and develop yourself. Most of all, know that you are an intelligent being who is capable of thinking for yourself. Do not follow others blindly.